MISSING

Thousands of Children are abducted every year, and in many cases, a parent is the primary suspect.

November 19, 1995

Jill Tucker
The Daily Times-Call

LONGMONT -- A full cycle of holidays and birthdays have passed since Jack Ehli last saw his two small children. Four-year old Austin and 2-year old Bryanna were abducted from Portland, Ore., last December and are listed in national law enforcement computers as two of the nation's missing children.

Like the majority of abducted children, however, the Ehli kids were not taken by a stranger. They were taken by their mother, Christine Ehli, and hidden away from their father, who had full legal custody.

Jack Ehli has been searching for them ever since.

Living out of his car in a Lyons campground for almost two months, Jack said his search has brought him to Boulder County, where he believes his kids are living an isolated life full of lies.

Christine's sister, Linda Dinsmore, lives in Lafayette.

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"Every morning I wake up and the first thing that goes through my head is today may be the day," he said. "We have birthday and Christmas presents stacked to the ceiling back home."

Carrying year-old photographs and legal documents in a tattered shoe box, Ehli talked about the extensive search for the whereabouts of his ex-wife and two kids.

"It's been very expensive and very emotional," he said, adding he has spent about $10,000 and put 5,269 miles on his car in the last two months. "My daughter probably doesn't even know me."

But parent or family abductions are just one of several categories of missing children. Including runaways, throwaways, lost or injured, missing or non-family abductions, almost 1.5 million children were reported missing in one year.

"A city the size of Denver disappears every year," said Dave Rogers, executive director of Longmont's Vector Foundation (MCTF), a non-profit agency dedicated to finding missing children.

According to the Colorado Bureau of Investigation, there were 19,643 children reported missing in 1994 in Colorado.

"The numbers are high," said D'Ann Taflin, public affairs officer for the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children. "It's serious because the children are pawns."

Myths -vs- Reality

Although stranger abductions often get the most attention in the media, the reality is they account for about 2 percent of the country's missing children, Taflin said.

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Child snatching by a family member, especially a parent, is much more common.

Often in the middle of a divorce or custody dispute, a parent absconds with a child in direct violation of the custody court order.

While nearly half of parent abductions last two days to a week, Ehli's situation falls into the minority of cases that last much longer, with the searching parent having no idea where his or her children are.

Another misconception, Taflin said, is that children are taken out of love and concern. The reality, he added, is they are taken out of revenge, greed and control.

"Most of the time, they're running out of spite for the other parent, not out of concern for the child," Taflin said.

Rogers who has found 228 missing kids in his career, has also spent several years as a private investigator. He said that in his experience allegations of some type of abuse are often filed only

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after divorce or custody proceedings have been initiated, and are often desperate attempts to maintain control.

Although some parents may be hiding their children because of legitimate safety concerns, the vast majority are not.

According to Ehli, his case fits that mold. "She's using the kids to get back at me for a failed marriage," he said.

Christine Ehli's side of the story, however, is hidden along with her children. Her sister, could not be reached for comment.

Both the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and the Vector Foundation approach family abductions from what the courts have decided regardless of who's right and who's wrong in a custody battle.

"There's no way to put that in a blender and figure out who's wrong," Rogers said. "Let them go to a court and fight it out." Christine Ehli "needs to get back in the system and fight for her kids."

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Who Gets Hurt

As the parents fight for control and custody, however, it's ultimately the children who are hurt the most when they go into hiding with their mom or dad.

"They think they're helping and they're just scarring," said Charles Picket, a case manager at the National Center. "Riding off into the sunset... shouldn't be one of the option."

Picket handles more than 400 open cases and has 600 more waiting for a break.

Since going into hiding requires changing names and identities and living a series of lies, kids are placed in the middle of a confusing and deceitful situation.

"The whole surrounding of being on the run is an abusive situation," Rogers said, "They learn not to trust the people they should be trusting most. They're kept away from the general public as much as possible."

The children, in many cases, are also lied to in order to make them understand why they can no longer see their mother or father.

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"There's a great number of cases where the child is severely brainwashed," Taflin said.

In one case, she added, a 7-or 8-year old girl was told by her father that hear mother was dead.

The grave, her father said, was in Germany and too far away to visit.

After five years, the mother found her 13-year old daughter who had already accepted a life without her mother. Any stability in that girl's life was shattered that day, Taflin said.

He added that he's confident he can find the Ehli kids. It may just take some time.

"It's terrible to put the kids through that," Rogers said. "At some point she's going to be found. She's putting off the inevitable."

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